This site is dumb
by Fatfan12345
Summary: Meet Dman. A being that IS A MAN! Who is sick of FF's nonsense while he waits for a special visitor to teach him a valuable lesson about friendship... and such...


Dman sat angrily at his computer before proclaiming " is the stupidest thing ever! I mean listen to how stupid this is!" 'Spell check all story and poetry. There is no excuse for not performing this duty. If you do not have a word processor that has the spell checking feature, use a search engine such as to find on' "CAN YOU BE ANYMORE OF A POMPUS JERK!? Who cares if the spelling is perfect!? This is fan fiction not the new york ducking times! And YES I meant to say ducking BECAUSE I CAN'T FLUFFING CURSE! And my nexty point" 'Proofread all entries for grammar and other aspects of writing before submission. 'Hot off the press' content is often riddled with errors. No one is perfect but it is the duty of the writer to perform to the best of his/her ability.' It's my duty to do diddly! This is supposed to be a site for fun! Not some asinine stupidity like I'm Steven freaking king! I make ZERO money off of this so why should it made if I proofread!? Nobody's gonna die if I don't proofread! Just reading these rules you can see that this site is run by bogus grammer nazis and losers who can't enjoy life at all! Although…" 'Respect the reviewers. Not all reviews will strictly praise the work. If someone rightfully criticizes a portion of the writing, take it as a compliment that the' "YES I have to agree a lot of people are too critical of critiques. And to that same point" 'Everyone here is an aspiring writer. Respect your fellow members and lend a helping a hand when they need it. Like many things, the path to becoming a better writer is often a two way street.' "THAT makes sense too. But then comes" 'Use proper textual formatting. For example: using only capital letters in the story title, summary, or content is not only incorrect but also a disregard for the language itself.' Dude, seriously SHUT THE DELL UP! If you think it's necessary to add garbage like that then you clearly don't know how to have fun!" 'The chapter system is not to be used as placeholder for non-story content such as author notes. You can add short author notes to the beginning or at the end of stories but never as individual chapters.' "WHY!?" Screamed Dman "What possible reason is there for that!? WHO ARE YOU PROTECTING BY PREVENTING PEOPLE FROM MAKING "LONG" AUTHOR NOTES!?" 'Do not upload chapters, series, or segments of a story as separate entries. In order to submit a 5 chapter story, for example, use the 'Create Story' page to submit chapter 1, and then use the 'Edit/Upload chapter' feature in the left menu, after login, to submit chapters 2 through 5.' "Again I ask. WHY!? WHAT IS THIS!? WHY ARE YOU BEING SUCH A PAIN THE BUTT!? AND DEVIANTART "DA" HAVE INFINITELY BETTER GUIDELINES FOR POSTING FAN FICTION!" 'Non-stories: lists, bloopers, polls, previews, challenges, author notes, and etc." WHY!? "One or two liners." WHY!? "MST: comments inserted in between the flow of a copied story.' "Okay seriously I know a guy on DA who makes MSTs AND THEY'RE AWESOME! Why can't people make MSTs here!? WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME REASONS FOR ANY OF THIS!? And story bloopers are always worth a good laugh! WHY ARE YOU DOING ALL THESE STUPID THINGS!?" 'Stories with non-historical and non-fictional characters: actors, musicians, and etc.' "… So we can't have ANY! Of the people in MILLIONS of fanfictions? We can't make self insert stories? No Celebrity relationship fics? WHY!? I see NO POSSIBLE REASON TO USE THIS SITE AT ALL!?" 'Any form of interactive entry: choose your adventure, second person/you based, Q&As, and etc.' THAT'S SO STUPID! Interactive stories are awesome! Why would you deprive people of interactive stories!? JUST ANOTHER REASON AND DA ARE BETTER! 'Chat/script format and keyboard dialogue based entries.' "I LIKE CHAT/SCRIPT FORMAT! IT'S MUCH NEATER THEN THIS NONSENSE! THIS IS THE STUPIDEST THING EVER!" 'Chapters of the same story are not allowed to be submitted as separate entries. All chapters/segments must be grouped together using the 'edit/upload chapter' feature in the left menu.' "That's stupid and most people shouldn't care about that" 'Rewriting names of characters/locations of one story in order to upload to multiple categories.' "WHY!? I personally don't like that but why deprive other people of it!? THIS IS A FAN FICTION SITE WHY ARE THERE SO MANY FREAKING RULES!?" 'Copying from a previously published work (including musical lyrics) not in the public domain.' "WHAT'S WRONG WITH USING SONG LYRICS!? THIS IS FAN FICTION! THERE SHOULDN'T BE ANY COPYRIGHT LAW MUMBO JUMBO FOR FAN FICITON!" 'Entry title and summary must be rated K for all audience. No exceptions' "See now THAT makes sense. Kids shouldn't be exposed to any kind of nonsense like that cause they're kids!" 'Entry must be given the proper rating. No exceptions.' "I Agree! Things that are wildly inappropriate should not be put in front of kids…" 'Entry must be placed in proper category. No exceptions' "WHY!? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SUCH A STICK IN THE MUD ABOUT EVERYTHING!? WHY NOT SAY THAT STUFF THAT ISN'T APPROPRIATE FOR KIDS SHOULD NEVER BE PUT IN A CATEGORY FOR KIDS!? YOU DON'T NEED TO BE SUCH A JERK ABOUT EVERYTHING, ! AND YOUR COMMENTING SYSTEM IS STUPID! WHY DO YOU MAKE IT SO IMPOSSIBLY STUPID TO TYPE IN A URL!? AND DON'T LET PEOPLE RIGHT SUPER VIOLENT STORIES!? OR HAVE HARD CORE ROMANCE!? WHY ARE YOU SUCH A SUCKY WEBSITE THAT SUCK!? WHY!?" Dman then huffed and ate pizza hut with Princess Celestia. Because Princesss Celestia has a snail mouth. You know how snails have a billion tiny razor sharp teeth? Yeah that's how Princess Celestia ate the pizza hut building. So yeah…

THE END!


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